Thursday, March 15, 2012

The Adventures of Joe and Abi: How Joe became a vegetarian

One of the things Joe and I enjoyed doing together during our long-distance courtship was playing Scrabble on Facebook - it's so much fun that we still play frequently that way, more often than playing a "real" game of Scrabble.

We both enjoy reading, writing, and word it was a natural progression for us to combine all these things in our Scrabble games. We decided to write a story along with the Scrabble game: every word we played had to be worked into the story somehow, as we went along. The resulting stories have often been both goofy and downright hilarious. :D An obvious side benefit is that we have to look up the meaning of each word and use it properly - so we're learning lots of fun new words also (another thing we both enjoy).

I've saved the text from these stories, calling them "The Adventures of Joe and Abi." Would you like a peek at a chapter? :) The words in CAPS are the words played in the game.

The Adventures of Joe and Abi: How Joe Became a Vegetarian

One day Joe was feeling oddly hungry and decided to grill himself a nice piece of BEEF.

Unfortunately there was no beef to be found in his fridge, so he went out and bought some BICORN instead.

"No bicorns were HARMED in the making of this steak," Joe read from the label. He raised his eyebrows suspiciously.

He decided he'd better HURL the steak as far from himself as possible for the packaging's shameful lies.

Joe stepped out his door and, with a loud BELLOW, let the bicorn steak fly with a fast overhand throw to the east.

"I wonder if I can join that CLIQUE of meat connoisseurs that Abi belongs to?" he thought to himself.

"Or, maybe if I can't join, I can snag her LOGINS to the CLIQUE'S website and see what they say about bicorn steaks."

"Until then, perhaps I can be content with some GUAVA."

Grabbing his bottle of guava and a bag of GRATED cheese to munch on, Joe sat down at the computer to see if he could catch Abi on chat and convince her to tell him the passwords to the meat clique website.

While he waited for Abi to sign on, he decided to look for a sale on TOWELS.

Quickly becoming bored, Joe's eyes became heavy and he spent the next hour in a DOZE at his desk.

While sleeping, he dreamed of several CANTOS that he might use to win Abi's affection (as well as access to her logins).

Unfortunately his dreams then turned to scenes of being trapped in a ZEK, and he jolted awake with a groan.

He went to find some coffee, which always PACIFIED his waking fears.

"Why can't I ever find a clean mug when I need one?" Joe GRIPEd.

Suddenly it clicked in his mind. "I must be paying for all those times I skipped out on PE."

"Oy, GUV," he said to the butler. "Would you mind pouring me a cup o' coffee?"

"ER..." the butler hesitated. "I thought you were an EX-coffee drinker? Something about it having too much XI baryon and all that...?"

"Of course, that's IT," Joe agreed. He looked out the window. "Hey, look, that chicken is OVIPOSITing!"

Realizing he was getting distracted, Joe went back to the computer, turned it ON, and signed IN to see if NAN (his new nickname for Abi) was on yet. "Just so I don't end up chatting with her PA again..." Joe murmured.

Nan popped onto the video instant messaging program and was, for some strange reason, wearing a JIJAB.

"Oh, JO," she said sweetly, her voice muffled under the fabric of her headdress. "See this lovely URN I just painted?"

"It looks like an ordinary JAR with bruises," Joe thought to himself. This was not what he wanted to talk to Nan about.

"Do you know how to DARN socks?" he asked, hoping to ease into getting her logins.

"Oh, yes," she answered impatiently. "EM taught me how years ago. But I want you to look at the beautiful MATT finish on my urn. It was very difficult to get it just right."

"Wow, that's BEEFY!" Joe exclaimed, using the current slang of the youth.

Glad that she finally had Joe's ATT., Abi continued to talk about her urn and her hijab, and all her latest projects. Joe eventually gave up on the idea of trying to get her logins, and decided to become a vegetarian. And they both lived happily ever after.

The End.

Want to read more of Joe and Abi's adventures? Leave a comment and tell us if you think painted urns look like jars with bruises. And if you've ever dreamed of being trapped in a zek, we want to hear about it!


  1. "Jars with bruises" is hilarious! I've seen a few that do. :)

  2. I'm laughing so hard; that's the silliest and most hilarious story! I love how creative you both are :)
    Hmm, painted urns could definitely look like jars with bruises if you did them in purple and blues and gave them a marble effect! =D

  3. Love! That was very funny. :) :) I laughed outright at the "jar with bruises" comment.